Want to discuss? Please read our Commenting Policy first. The online dating world for most is overwhelming when it comes to options, but if you have a sexually transmitted infection or disease, the pool can seem a lot smaller. Most people are introduced to these infections and diseases as a consequence of having unprotected sex or having multiple partners, Pierce says, and this further adds to the stigma. On top of this, some people just have infections and not diseases. Pierce says for starters, anyone with the disease or infection should know exactly what they have. This is a good first step to find people who have gone through the same experience, she says. In turn, someone with an STI could meet someone without an infection, but who is open to the idea of being with someone who does. In this situation, education is key, she says, and you have to be direct and confident to bring up the conversation as it comes. This, of course, is something only people with that STI would know.
Why I Will Never Support Herpes or STI Dating Sites
I am uncomfortable using dating sites because I have genital herpes. I was infected by my first husband more than 40 years ago. If I meet someone on one of those sites, when is the right time to reveal my problem? After we have gotten to know each other? Or should I say something when we first meet? Many people carry the virus, and a surprising number of them are not aware they have it and can infect others.
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Learn more about your condition from others who have experienced the same feelings. Get the latest information about a possible cure for herpes, vaccination and treatment options. Read member herpes drug reviews, side effects and success stories. Meet others who understand what you are feeling and are also looking to move on with their lives. Dating with herpes can be difficult and at times, frightening. Meeting others who suffer from the same conditions offers you peace of mind. Our members understand you, understand your fears and looking forward to feeling normal again.
Going on dates knowing you have a secret is stressful, so why put yourself through that, haven’t you been through enough? A lot of people are surprised by how common herpes is.
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A few years ago, back when I was regularly trolling OKCupid for dates, I received a message from a potential paramour. He’d been scanning through the survey answers associated with my profile, and one response in particular gave him pause: when asked whether I’d consider dating someone with herpes, I’d responded no. It wasn’t some carefully considered stance on sexual transmitted infections, or grand statement about herpes.
For him, however, it was a potential deal breaker: As you’ve probably figured out by now, my suitor was a member of that vast group of sexually active adults who’ve been infected with herpes. The internet was supposed to be transformative for people with incurable, but highly preventable, STIs like herpes simplex virus HSV who wanted to date while being open about their status.
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I am a year-old woman, attractive and lonely. I am uncomfortable using dating sites because I have genital herpes. I was infected by my first husband more than 40 years ago. If I were to meet someone on one of those sites, when would be the right time to reveal my problem? After we have gotten to know each other? Or should I be up front about it and say something when we first meet?
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